Hey what's up? can I start working out with you Lol.

srsly are you real or just something someone on the Misc made up?

It's OK if we're up front.

Original Message YOU sent on 11/27/2011 3:34:41 PM
me:ok cool. this sounds like the start of an extremely healthy relationship.

him: Haha, domestic violence here we come... ****, I'm gonna have to start lifting.

I was just thinking to myself after seeing you, that I would literally hug a cactus then swim thru shark infested water to do battle with an angry
polar bear, just for the chance to share a spaghetti dinner with you. If you could respond with squat bench and deadlift stats, we may get
married.

turn it off

"I am so turned on by your profile : )"

yes but not how ur thinkin

"do you wanna kick my ass?"

Youuuu should come over and ride my face.

Let's bench press each other naked

really? it weighs 200 lbs?

"u can't lift my****tho it to heavy for u"

this is the same guy with the huge italian penis allegedly

"i like muscular girls, nothing better than bending a grl over and being able to grab onto her lats :)"

this guy has been messaging me like every week and i always ignore him...

"Subject: Hi
From: telephasicwshop
Sent Date: 7/31/2011 6:37:11 PM
View Profile View All Messages

Dudeeeeee you got big!"

We were discussing careers...

"Original Message YOU sent on 7/31/2011 10:19:16 AM
social work

Do you like it?

I hate to ask this, but do you mind "bigger" guys? I don't mean in the body type way either. I mean "big feet" kind of guys. I ask this now, because it is a big problem (no pun intended) lately, and it is quite embarrassing in the moment. So thats why I ask this now."

probably well intentioned but still creepy

"Good morning :D

How are you? How did you sleep?"

yum

"A first date could be me force feeding you with a funnel down your throat for 3 months with high fat food and then I could remove your liver and make pate with it for us to enjoy."

Subject: I masturbated to your profile
From: Yo_Flo
Sent Date: 7/30/2011 11:48:18 PM
View Profile View All Messages

Diznizzam, not sure we should meet though.

keep in mind these are all completely unsolicited..

"make me wanna bite that thigh"

Upon receipt, a cold shower was immediately in order

"hey hwats up ur pretty i workou ttoo i seeu do i think lol ya im about to go to work ima armored truck driver money trucks i carry gun n vest n hit its hot tho sucks lol if u wanna text me u can 609-***-**** wouldnt mind getting to know u"

about to open up a can of vegan whoop ass

"Subject: Hi
From: No Bueno
Sent Date: 7/27/2011 8:10:10 PM
View Profile View All Messages Chat with No Bueno

im suprised u have that much muscle on you being a vegan"

Not from you

"Subject: hey
From: bennytolocal
Sent Date: 7/26/2011 8:31:19 AM
View Profile View All Messages

U need a baby oil massage"

Vestigial Organ = Ice Breaker?

"Hi there, excuse me, can I ask if you did have an appendectomy surgery?

thank you,
xo
Bibo


..I had my appendix removed :-S The same for you??"

I hope this is about birthday cake

"8 inches long and 6 all around. Interested?"

Country Music Star!

"Original Message YOU sent on 7/26/2011 5:16:56 PM
i never said u were racist. im just saying that i read ur profile and wanted to point out our differences lol.

Thats cool, I like to concentrate on similarities, I dont know if we have any, most people do usually dont find out till your in a storm or bad attack on out country , people you wouldnt talk to become easy to talk to and important,, life is strange, Im deep thinker, Not nuts but deep thinker, I analize everyting, Thats what make me love writing music, I get deep.. So anyway I hope your meeting the who your looking for doc, you seem pretty cool.. Im mike BTW"

Pimple Popper MD

"Msw? Masters of social work? I thought you were a dermatologist? What did you study at juliard? I dont just want crazy sex, granted I don't not want crazy sex either, but I'm in kind of a low point, totally dissatisfied with the direction of my life and trying to figure out my next move. I'm mostly tempted to up sticks and start fresh somewhere new, so I definàtely don't want a relationship in that mix. It wouldn't be fair to anyone. Seriously though, I'd pay to have you train me! I bet you could get tons of guys to sign up! You could have one of those workout videos guys watch when their wives and gf's aren't around"

Party in the USA!

Subject: Party in the USA!
From: nicksic
Sent Date: 7/25/2011 8:30:50 PM
Chat with nicksic
View Profile
View All Messages


Hey........ I bet you're a huge miley cyrus fan.

What's your kitty cat's name? How many pull-ups can you do?

Nick

I actually liked this one

"I know we haven't met but I think we should stop seeing each other"

ewww

"Original Message YOU sent on 7/25/2011 5:22:17 PM
ive never tried a one rep max. 5 rep max is 105


I'm slightly turned on by that. That's pretty damn impressive for a girl."

I'd rather rip my nail out of its socket with a 60lbs ezbarbell...oh wait I did...

"Plentyoffish customercare@plentyoffish.com to me

show details 11:33 AM (8 hours ago)

4play4unme has added you to favorites! at 8:33:07 AM on Monday, July 25, 2011 (Pacific Standard Time), to delete your self from 4play4unme's list go here: http://www.plentyoffish.com/wholovesme.aspx"

From: Sexyman1111, Subject: "hey cutie", CC: FML

"hi cutie,how are you doing today? your a hottie :0 i would love to rock your world baby ;) (lol) i would spoil you like craze becould your so cute.(lol). i can be a great friend with benefits,casual date or if u like maybe a sugar daddy.i am very good looking.i have more pics, if u want to see and u r game ask me.I love to have fun do you? i know how to treat a girl right. so lets have some fun are you game? have a nice week.( if not sorry)....ttyl cutie"

"???"

"Tried messaging you last night, looks like it never went through.

If you didnt get it, I'll do my best to recreate the magic that was in that first message...

-NAME"

How does it know??

give me a blind fold and some earplugs and i'll consider it

"i wanna rub those shoulders. never spent time with a muscular woman"

Told a a dude he looks different in all of his pics...

"so do you ...come to think of it you look like a beauty pagent contestant in one pic t
han you look like Sammi from the jersey shore in another pic...haha"

Nope

"not bad... are you friendly?"

No thanks, I don't even know you, but I know you can't spell...

"you look great in a two piesce

xoxoxo

I'd love to take you to Barbados with me in 2 weeks: have you ever been???"

madonna mia....

"whats up hun? you look good! gorgeous eyes! think you can handle a "big" italian? :-) im 6'3 225lbs 10in and so thick guaranteed you cant wrap your hands around it."

Just no

"Wow aren't u so sexy, kissable and yummy looking"

"You seem normal. I am not. Let's sip Rosay and do push-ups until we puke. "

I found the real quote about the chain swingin...thanks to my girl.

"Im not really into materialistic and if you are I might get nauseous and throw up all over you.
-Im not a religious nut job but I always wear my cross. If Im on top of you making out Ill just swing it around the back of my neck. "

?

What in the Christ is a mung bean?

You heard right...

"Rick ross is pretty cool. I heard he's "Da baw..."

How to impress a vegan...

Subject: Hi
From: BoilerMaker11
Sent Date: 7/18/2011 8:17:51 PM
View Profile
View All Messages


I tried to be a vegan, Cheese is my fall back

Don't worry....

"I'm Italian, I wear a chain, but don't worry when I'm on top of you making out I'll swing it around the back of my neck".

Pretty much...

"u dont respond to no msgs. i bet u wouldnt even piss on me if i was on fire. ****! "

FML

"I'm sorry to be so upfront, i'm into your profile so please don't be offended... do you like having a guy go down on you? If you do you found the right guy, your so beautiful I'd do it anytime you wanted it... once i find a beautiful cool girl to do that for, you'll be the only one, i wouldn't ever do this for more then one person at a time... i need that to be able to focus on work and my career. I want you to use me for this anytime you want... and i hope its often... if you want more... or whatever else we do is up to you. do you like that?"

feet again

Original Message YOU sent on 6/14/2011 6:38:47 AM
more pics?


i need to get more i'd love to blow my load all over your feet

...

From: mrmike1986 (View Profile) (View All Correspondence)
Subject: Hi Sent Date: 10/17/2010 6:18:56 PM

do you have a jungle downstairs?

Jan 30th 2011

" your body is so sexy and amazing. i am so horny just looking at you "

June 2011 - out of nowehere...

"i dont do no juice or smoke or none of that. but i got a mean long pipe. and you go work out and come home sore ill massage you after a hot shower. . then i rock that p.us.sy till you go to sleep"

FAIL

Original Message YOU sent on 7/17/2011 9:08:11 AM
Belmar or spring lake. wanna go?....


im too hungover to drive lol

..

...

,,,

,,,

Met this guy a few weeks ago, and today he says....

"Your very attractive I wanted to bang your brains out lol"

"PuppyLover" demands my phone number

""**takes
care of her hands and feet(yes, i have a bit of foot fetish, if your feet look
amazing, but, you aren't the best looking female in the room, id probably still try
to flirt with you first. BIG PLUS, if you enjoy getting your feet rubbed, played
with and kissed --*****(ill add more soon).... If you'd like to know more about
me, drop me a message, with some general conact info"